A note....

I wrote this to a friend, and have removed all evidence as to whom it was intended for.... I thought that perhaps it would help people to see more of the person that I am.... and am becoming each day.....


I am sorry that you are feeling this way. Your feelings are never wrong or misplaced, perhaps just misunderstood.... I know it's hard being so far away from everything that you grew up with and had pictured would be in your life forever. Childhood can seem so perfect at times, yet so wrong at others. There are things that we embrace and try to hold on to with all our might, and things that we try to bury deep inside the very inner reaches of our brains. As Children, these are reflexes learned early on as means for protection. As adults, we look at the world through different eyes, manage to give up the securities of comfortable things and do things we once thought would be impossible. We give up lives, places, people and ideas that we grew up knowing would always be there. Time can heal, that is what is said, but it can also create walls that take a lot of work to remove. So, is time really a good healer? I don't think so, I think that it just allows us to separate ourselves from hurt without necessarily dealing with it. Time can pass, words can not be said, and the longer we wait, the harder it seems to be to get those words out. And then you pass a bridge, a point of o return, where those words are silenced and can no longer be spoken. Things about us are assumed, people take for granted the person that we used to be, happy children of years ago. But Time is a thief, taking our childhood and our memories with it, leaving us nothing but the now, however consuming and overwhelming it may be. We have to learn to deal with the now, find a way to get out of our current path and out into the open air again. We, as humans, have a great desire to be loved and receive love in return, but when that desire is harmed through unknown reasons, we have a second tendency to look inward at ourselves to find a "problem" that needs "fixing." We automatically think that if the world doesn't see us, if we seem to be becoming more and more invisible, that it is some defect in ourselves. But no defect will be found, because God created a perfect you, he made you. Beautifully and wonderfully made..... You are exactly what he imagined you would be, and He knows exactly where you are and the struggles that you face each and every day. You are Loved by Him and have been loved by and have loved more people in the world than you will ever know. Please remember that you are Beautiful in ours eyes, and His eyes. And though time and distance make it easy for people to loose contact, contact can be regained. We all need to make it a priority. So, FIGHT that inner tendency to hide and find fault, look outward, the WORLD has FAULT, not you!! Remove the fault that you find in the world, hurtful people, hurtful places and things, leave only LOVE, God's Love. And know that you are never truly invisible. Because God always sees us. And if you ask Him, He will provide. Just last month<>

I Love you as a Sister! And though I know that I don't get on here near enough to talk with you, you have to know that all of us love you and hold you dear in our hearts as a treasure. You are a "Comfort" that will be in our hearts forever! God has kept all of us together, and if we all pray, He will Keep us together if that is His will.