The Faith of a Centurion

The Faith of a Centurion

"5 When he had entered Capernaum, a centurion came forward to him, appealing to him, 6 “Lord, my servant is lying paralyzed at home, suffering terribly.” 7 And he said to him, “I will come and heal him.” 8 But the centurion replied, “Lord, I am not worthy to have you come under my roof, but only say the word, and my servant will be healed. 9 For I too am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. And I say to one, ‘Go,’ and he goes, and to another, ‘Come,’ and he comes, and to my servant, ‘Do this,’ and he does it.” 10 When Jesus heard this, he marveled and said to those who followed him, “Truly, I tell you, with no one in Israel have I found such faith. 11 I tell you, many will come from east and west and recline at table with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven, 12 while the sons of the kingdom will be thrown into the outer darkness. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.” 13 And to the centurion Jesus said, “Go; let it be done for you as you have believed.” And the servant was healed at that very moment."

The Centurion of Mat. 8 has huge faith, unlike any Jesus has met before, but he also has huge respect for who Jesus is, Lord, and sees his own depravity reflected off of Christ's righteousness. He is one of the few who looked at his own condition honestly in the presence of Jesus and understood his unworthyness. Yet, he also knew Jesus was full of mercy and grace, so never gave up hope that Jesus could and would help. What can we all learn from this? Approaching Jesus with what is in our hearts is important, but we must recognize the importance of understanding the difference and significance between our unrighteousness and Christ's perfection. We must first ask him to reveal to us our own condition, and seek honestly what needs to be dealt with in our own hearts, and then once that work is addressed, we can work on the things he has laid on our hearts. I personally feel that we are so limited in our prayer lives because we come so insistently and persistently with requests we hold dear, but forget that God is first and foremost concerned with our personal conditions. He always wants to bring it back around so it is about us, even when we crave for it to be about something else, beyond us for once! It just proves that he really does want what us best for us, and has our best interests in the center of his heart.

A Few Thoughts...Life Journaling: Matthew 6:19-34

Lay Up Treasures in Heaven

19 x“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where ymoth and rust5 destroy and where thieves zbreak in and steal, 20 xbut lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

22 a“The eye is the lamp of the body. So, if your eye is healthy, your whole body will be full of light, 23 abut if byour eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light in you is darkness, how great is the darkness!

24 c“No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and dmoney.6

Do Not Be Anxious

25 e“Therefore I tell you, fdo not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 gLook at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. hAre you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his ispan of life?7 28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29 yet I tell you, jeven Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, kO you of little faith? 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For lthe Gentiles seek after all these things, and myour heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33 But nseek first othe kingdom of God and his righteousness, pand all these things will be added to you.

34 q“Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

It is important to read these verses together, in context, because when we read them apart, I think the spirit of the verses is lost. The end verses can be used in justification by people who advocate against planning and preparation such as insurance, saving food from a good harvest for winter, and having a good supply of firewood... But perhaps these verses aren't telling us not to prepare. What they may be saying is that we can't let our preparations become an idol, receiving our devotion. For when we think we "are prepared" or "have it together" of our own doing, therein lies our issue! We can never, with of amount of preparation, be ready for what life will dish out. We must always rely on God first, no plan B. When we are blessed with enough to save for later, we must analyze this. Are we really to hang on to it, or have we been entrusted with the task of finding a person who needs it more than us? We are to bless others with what we have, even if it doesn't look like much. We ALWAYS have something to give. And when we are faithful with a little, we are blessed with more blessings to be responsible for. And then it is our job to be sure that those blessings don't become and idol to us, making us feel proud, stingy and conceited. What is in our hearts? A true desire to see everyone full of joy, working together to make Gods kingdom on earth prolific? Or a secret desire to feel "safe" and "secure?" These feelings are often rooted in pride, and flourish in an unwillingness to respond in obedience when God is asking us to respond in RADICAL obedience. We are all asked to analyze this in our own hearts, what is there? Will we receive a "good and faithful servant" from our savior? Remember this on this Easter weekend, he died so we can live, and live to the fullest, but not to our own devices, but rather according to all he has planned for us, which happens to be AN AMAZING LIFE!!

Life Journaling: Distractions

Today my reading was in Jeremiah 13-15 and John 15. Jeremiah 15:16-20 says:

¹⁶ Your words were found, and I ate them,
    and your words became to me a joy
    and the delight of my heart,
for I am called by your name,
    O Lord, God of hosts.

(...Jeremiah digests, delights in and speaks Gods words to the people for their own good...)

¹⁷ 

I did not sit in the company of revelers,

    nor did I rejoice;
I sat alone, because your hand was upon me,
    for you had filled me with indignation.

(...He doesn't participate in the sin they are performing, he is set apart and God has filled him with wrath...)

¹⁸ Why is my pain unceasing,
    my wound incurable,
    refusing to be healed?
Will you be to me like a deceitful brook,
    like waters that fail?

(...Jeremiah, like any human in his situation is questioning his pain and asks why his wounds are not healing...he wonders if God is really protecting him; if he is there with him. He asks God if he will let him down and leave like a river that runs dry...)

¹⁹ Therefore thus says the Lord:
“If you return, I will restore you,
    and you shall stand before me.
If you utter what is precious, and not what is worthless,
    you shall be as my mouth.
They shall turn to you,
    but you shall not turn to them.
²⁰ And I will make you to this people
    a fortified wall of bronze;
they will fight against you,
    but they shall not prevail over you,
for I am with you
    to save you and deliver you,
declares the Lord. 

(...God  assures Jeremiah that He is there and will protect him, but that persecution will continue. As long as Jeremiah knows that the Lord is with him, persecution doesn't matter...)

John 15 talks about the vine, and the branches that reside in it bearing much fruit. Like Jeremiah, we must abide completely in the vine to have Gods full protection as well as to bear much fruit.

On my run yesterday, the word God gave me was distraction. He showed me that even ministry work, and "good works" like service etc. can all be a distraction, hence not a good thing, if they are keeping us from working on our relationship with him. God never asks us to do anything that will take away from our time with him. So if we are feeling too busy to have our morning quiet time, we must look at our activities, even the ones we "do for The Lord" and see which ones are distracting us. Many of our works are ours to do, and God blesses our efforts, but if our efforts are not bearing fruit, we must look at our intentions and motivations. Satan will allow us to do ministry work alone because he knows it will lead to burn out and lack luster fruit.

At our church recently, the women have been discussing and studying the effect of spiritual health on the body, both emotionally as well as physically. I can see that if we are struggling with any type of health, we must first look at our spiritual health. The root issue will most likely be there.  Do we feel Gods complete love for us, do we know he has our backs, do we trust that he has done the job completely, do we think that without our efforts something will fail and God won't work there? Nothing in ministry depends completely on us, if we feel an event or ministry will fail if we don't do our "job" we are wrong. If it is truly our job to do, God will give us the time, strength, ability, motivation and desire to do it how he needs it to be done, but not at the expense of our time with him. Isn't that amazing??!!  We serve an awesome, gracious and merciful God who only wants the very best for us.

Life Journaling: Straight Paths

My life journaling passages for today, May 26th are Proverbs 1-3 and Romans 7. As I was reading, several verses were being illuminated to me.

First was Proverbs 1:7, "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, fools despise wisdom and knowledge." -This must be the first step in our relationship with Christ, right? We must have that deep reverence and awe of His greatness and power! He is, after all, the "Great I Am!" I think the fear of the Lord is minimized in the western prosperity gospel that is preached in some places.

Second was Proverbs 1:23, "If you turn at my reproof, behold, I will pour out my spirit to you;  I will make my words known to you." -We must be willing to receive correction from the Lord, knowing that He knows what is best for us. If we are available to be corrected, we can receive outpouring of the spirit, which has often been turned down to a trickle because of our stubbornness. 

Third was Proverbs 2:4-5, "if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God." This says that we must seek to understand the fear of the Lord... 

Fourth was Proverbs 2:7-10, 

"he stores up sound wisdom for the upright;

   he is a shield to those who walk in integrity,
⁸ guarding the paths of justice
    and watching over the way of his saints.
⁹ Then you will understand righteousness and justice
    and equity, every good path;
¹⁰ for wisdom will come into your heart,
    and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul..."

To me this says that when we walk in the path God has for us, we will be seeking justice; our paths will be guarded. It also says that we will understand righteousness and justice and equity, which are called the "good path." So, when we search and seek to understand the fear of God, like searching for something as precious as treasures, we will understand and fear the Lord while finding the knowledge of God. The knowledge of God, which we will understand is righteousness, justice and equity, will help direct our paths of justice and the Lord will be watching over the way of His saints. 

Last, from Proverbs 3:5-6, 

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
    and do not lean on your own understanding.
⁶ In all your ways acknowledge him,

    and he will make straight your paths."

We must have God's understanding, and God's heart then we can pursue paths of justice. Only then will we be in God's will and will have God as our shield.

There are so many more great verses in these first three chapters, but these were the ones that hadn't stood out to me before. It probably looks a lot like proof texting, but, I didn't read these chapters with the intention of proving anything about fear of the Lord and it's link to straight and just paths... I came to the conclusions I came to while reading :)

https://docs.google.com/open?id=0BwdHSRZBjaX1dmFnZGRBX2g3bWs

Here is the link for our Christmas Letter! Enjoy!

Urban Mission Dynamic Weekend

this past weekend was amazing...

God was really working on my heart in several different ways

what I have learned is that the DTES zip code is the most impoverished zip code in N.A. 

I went through the weekend asking God to show me what he is doing, and I wanted to see God in the people.

What he showed me was shocking...

I have learned to hate the brokenness.

I hate the circumstances that the people are born into.

I hate that the foster system is a joke and is used like a bad business.

I hate that they have addictions that they most likely they will die with.

I hate that they will most likely never escape the bondage that sin and addiction are in their lives.

I hate that they know their Bible better than me

I hate that they are the most evangelized people in N.A.

I hate that they have been evangelized without love because people don't know how to reach out to them and accept the reality of sin and its separateness from the person.

I hate that people can go give them a cookie, say "Jesus loves you" and then walk away with a clean conscience.

God made me fall in love with his people there. 

I don't see the sin any more, I just see his image born into a life of poverty and choices that had to be made for survival.

people very easily pass judgment on the people down there, they say things like "they made the choices in their life that has put them there..."

A few of them have, but mostly they were given no choices

They didn't have parents who loved them and gave them the affection they needed.

They didn't have someone to tell them that God loves them and created them and cares for them 

They didn't have homes to come home to and feel safe in

All they had was severe pain, pain from many different things, pain that children are never supposed to know

Pain that drives them to either suicide or escape by other means.

Other means usually means heavy addiction to whatever thing can get them away. In their conscious moments they are searching for love, but when they never find it, they search for a way to not feel anything.

The leaders who work down there are amazing people. Many of them are Christians.

They have had to realize that the gospel message that they were most likely raised on, is not the message that will reach out to these people.

they live with the harsh reality that most of what they do down there will never be noticed or appreciated.

The rest of the world tells them that they are wasting their time, not understanding how anyone could possibly see the image of God  in these people.

The world tells them that they are stupid for trying to work there, that they should go some where else if they want to work for God.

Many of them have changed the way they dress, walk and talk, they even let their hair get greasy (things that don't matter to God) just so that the people won't be afraid of them, or hide from them.

They just try to be real.

To do this honestly, they have to be real all the time, not just when they are in the DTES.

What does this look like? 

When they go home, when they go to a restaurant, when they walk the streets of gas town and pass the trendy and expensive shops, they have to be real. They face real shame for the sacrifice they are willing to make for Christ.

8 See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ. Col 2:8

 2 Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. Col 3:2

14 And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts... Col 3:14

 3 Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.

19 For though I am free from all, I have made myself a servant to all, that I might win more of them. 20 To the Jews I became as a Jew, in order to win Jews. To those under the law I became as one under the law (though not being myself under the law) that I might win those under the law. 21 To those outside the law I became as one outside the law (not being outside the law of God but nunder the law of Christ) that I might win those outside the law. 22 To the weak I became weak, that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all people, that by all means I might save some. 23 I do it all for the sake of the gospel, that I may share with them in its blessings. 1 Cor. 9:19

The next time you see a homeless person, don't think "what choices did this person make to end up here?"

think "what severe hurt and trauma has this person been through that has left them in such bondage and hurt?"

People shouldn't be defined by their sin. They should be defined by their creator

As for the workers, they don't get rewarded and honored by the world, they have to make peace with that.

What does this mean for our church?

Are we worried about our image to God? or to the world?

How can we be different, so that the broken and lost in our neighborhood can feel truly, I mean TRULY welcome here?

DO we hand them clean clothes and offer them a shower?

Or does that send the wrong message.

What does it really mean to accept them as Christ would accept them?

Can we be truly unashamed of the gospel, and the Christ that we serve?

The Ten Talents

I wonder sometimes when I hear people say "If it's God's will for my life" what they really mean. Does it mean that they are truly praying for God's desires for them to match their own desires. The Bible does teach us that generally if we pray for our desires, God will grant them. It's not a promise, or a guarantee, but more a guideline for life, as Psalms and Proverbs are.

People who leave major decisions to chance, things like finding a job, leaving a job, accepting responsibility for a position at church, or even family planning I want to ask this question of. "Do you really not care what God wants for you, are you willing to accept what God wants for you, or are you just saying "let it be God's will" to pass responsibility of discernment from yourselves, to God. Sometimes I wonder if people say this really intending to accept what God does plan for them. Sort of like removing your hands from the steering wheel of a car and demanding God to supernaturally prove that He can drive. True, God is omnipotent, but He is also not at our command to satisfy all of our wishes, like a genie in a bottle.

The true task for a Christian is prayer and proper discernment for our own lives. We should pray that God and the Holy Spirit guide us to proper responsibility, right? Doing our best to bring glory to Him, and praying that the Holy Spirit will guide our decisions is key.

Is what we are really saying by "God's will" really a "I really don't know what is best God, but I truly and completely trust that you will give me what is best for me" or is it "I don't want to take the time to talk with you about it, or I don't feel like dealing with the responsibility of making a decision of my own with your help, so you choose and then let me know what you decide. If you choose well, and I am happy, then you did a good job God. But if what you choose for me makes me miserable, then I'm going to throw a fit. I just know that I don't want the responsibility of making the decision, because if it turns out horribly, then I don't want to be the one to blame. You can take it, God. Your bigger than me."

Really??

It's like the "magic Bible" way of reading scriptures for answers to our questions. Sure, I will not discredit that God can't speak to believers in this way, but He wants us to be more mature in our seeking of answers. We are not teenagers with a Magic 8 Ball in our hands. The Bible is not a question and answer book, per see, but rather the story of God and who He is and how He constantly seeks and redeems us. If we read it, we should learn more about Him, and when we understand more about God's character and hopes for our lives, we have added to our understanding of how he hopes we will live our lives. Through learning more about God, we can learn more about who we are and what He created us to be.

This is as much to myself as any one else, but don't play the "You Choose" card with God unless you are honestly prepared to accept what He knows is best for your life. We must remember that Satan is the king of this world, and has authority to run amuck in it for now. Satan would like nothing better than to see you leave a decision open for anyone or thing to decide besides God or yourself. Like leaving a pile of cash out on the counter at a pub, leaving and then saying, "God will keep my money safe!" God has left you responsible for what He has given you authority over, take responsibility for the talents you have been given, and deal respectfully with them. The master will be home in a while to see what you have accomplished.

God wants so much for us to desire to live our lives with His will in our hearts. But he doesn't want us to seek that blindly, without preparation, discernment or understanding of what He is asking. He wants us to love Him! He wants us to ask Him to guide us, or carry us when we need it. Above all, God is Love, triune love, expressed in perfect unity in the trinity. He wants us to come and take part in perfect community with Him; He desires that we develop a deep relationship with him, relationships are not just one way with one person making all the decisions.

Christ gave us the mental picture of the bridegroom and the bride as Himself and the church or body of believers. To be part of this body, we must be maturing, actively participating followers of Christ. Children do not marry, yet people have to accept Christ with faith like a child, and then they must progress to maturity marrying into the body. The Groom has the ultimate authority, but the groom also respects what the bride thinks and feels and He desires to teach her, train her, disciple her, love her, care for her, give her what she wants (even if it goes against what He wants for her), and have a relationship that defies all human understandings of love and intimacy on this earth! If the bride truly wants what is best for the relationship, she will talk through, debate and show passion for the tough conversations that need to be had. She doesn't just stand there and accept that her fate is out of her hands. Our lives are not pre-determined, they are what we make of them. We can either choose to follow Christ, or we can choose to stay behind. We can choose to be God's partner in our lives, or we can follow blindly, never partaking in the necessary discipline of discussing things with God.

For me, He had to discuss A LOT with me about going back to school. I really thought that I understood that God wanted us to "Go!" To me, that meant just going. Not staying! Staying didn't sound nearly as fun. So, God and I had to talk about that for a while, several weeks in fact, before I was ready to hear the rest of His plan. He wouldn't tell me the rest of the plan until I was ready to accept it without fighting back. He had to spoon feed it to me. All I kept praying for was that my will would be the same as His will for my life. I didn't care what that will was, I just wanted my own will to fade away and be replaced with His. Slowly, as I was honestly more and more ready to hear that will, He showed me. If He had dumped it all on me when I asked Him to, I would have rejected it and turned away, or at least would have taken a lot longer to come back around... He knows what is best for me, including what to tell me when. I trust Him completely in that. God's timing is perfect, but only if we are of the mind to wait for it and accept it when it comes.

So now, here I am, one day from finishing up my first year of Bible college! 46 credits down!! We are feeling God's leading to Portugal for a three year internship with Otto and Marjorie Ekk. It will be an amazing ride, but any of this, I know can change at any time. I am prepared to follow, and discerning where that will be is my responsibility.